Q: Do you know what killed the man who had a two ton pumpkin fall on him? A: He was squashed.
Humor · Made
36 posts in Humor that are creative work and self-promotion, where the model is sure of the intent. Page 1 of 2: the top 7, then 10 the model is less sure belong here.
Ranked Bluesky · Mastodon
About 5 in 10 posts here get an intent label; the model only labels the ones it is sure of.
You're walking down the street. We lock eyes. Then I pull out my phone. I look serious. Then I ask the question nobody expects: "You wanna see a shitload of pelicans?" 🪶 🦑
"I heard you struck my son." "Yes sir, I did." "Then may I ask why?" "Yeah, well, because he stole John Wick's car, sir, and uh. Killed his dog." "Oh."
Alien Fungus: "Eww! There was a *human* in this pod and I've been growing out of his *eye socket!* Grody!" Human Colonist: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" Alien Fungus: "Look, buddy, I'm not exactly pleased with this arrangement either"
girl suffering from erectile dysfunction be like "my dick has no game like a PS3"
If you get married, you tell that person EVERYTHING.
More in Humor
The model is less sure these belong here, so they sit outside the ranking.
"I have been baptized twice, once in water, once in gasoline from that minivan."
No gunpowder, no explosives, just electromagnetism hurling metal at 8 times the speed of sound, fast enough to tear through steel plates like paper.
cargo shorts season lasts until your nose hairs freeze when you walk outside.
"Huh, no? We don't have an omelas kid. That's just the young reincarnation of a lama that is very good at doing taking and giving."
"At the risk of angering my beloved friends, i will say that i have come to the conclusion that a hot dog is not a sandwich. Its a taco"
her: baby why wont you talk to me anymore? me, taking a long drag of my cigarette: you just clearly didnt have what it takes to be a parkour civilization pro
If humans had dog ears, poker would never have taken off
when i turn green its not because you can put me down. it's because i'm afflicted with poison
UDTF but you just turn into a living mini Australia on US or EU soil
Holster the penis 🤠 Until it’s time to shoot pew pew
