Do you want to come to my apartment warming party? “Who’s going to be there?” Me. “Who else?” You. “Anyone else?” Probly not. “Does that count as a party?” Depends on what we do I guess. Oh, I forgot. There’s also a mannequin!
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[before party] Me: I'll stay safe & stick to ONE drink at the office Halloween party [party] Me (sloshed): GREAT COSTUME, MARK Mark: I'm not in costume..? Me: THEN WHY DO YOU LOOK EXACTLY LIKE A SELF-IMPORTANT JERK
